What I Yearn For
Somedays I am calm and content, I float through my day with ease and enjoyment. Other days I fumble and get frustrated but on an even fewer days I burn and yearn for something I am not sure exists.
Beauty in all of its forms has always been a major focus of my life. At its more shallow I loved to know beauty trends and fashions as a teen, in its deeper depth I long for words that move me, music that compels me and surroundings that inspire me. And the days where I burn and ache for a way of life I am not sure fully exists, an ideal somewhere, I am always yearning for more beauty. Not for prettier things to own but for a life that doesn’t feel devoid of spirit.
There are many days I can enjoy and make the most of errands in big box stores and navigating parking lots. I do my due diligence to keep my thoughts grateful and light. But some days, like yesterday, I grieve for something that feels like it might be so far away..
My soul yearns for meaningful interactions, a world filled with nature and creations that feel like joyful and beautiful art. Our modern lives contain so much stimulation and access to images, sounds and information of all kinds but our outer world’s are becoming more bland. Cement, straight lines, treeless city scapes, humans who only wear clothes for comfort not expression (no judgement, I like comfort too) and fluorescent lit grocery stores with aisles and aisles of processed foods is not the stuff of my fantasy. And yet, I am grateful. We have conveniences everywhere. But in that, interacting with other humans and natural beauty is no longer convenient it is something we must make an effort for.
I dont share all of this to make you more angry about the world, but maybe to inform you of a silent depressor: soulless landscapes and interactions. I believe that our inward experience defines the outer and that we can choose joy again and again. But I also believe that it can be more of a challenge in our world. It’s an exercise to cultivate a mind lit up by life. When I take time and I ride my bike or walk in nature it doesn’t take long for me to begin to feel differently. There were times in human history where this would be part of my life more naturally, there are places right now where they still are. I dont long for the limitations of the past but I think many of us silently and unknowingly long for lives or more stillness, presence and beauty.
I encourage you today to give in to this desire. Go take the intentional moment to see beauty. Maybe it means you take a longer more scenic drive to work, or you take lunch in a park, or you host a small dinner with home cooked food and you use your grandmothers china. You could go to the garden store or even a charming shop that has cultivated an intentional feel inside. Beauty is not only about the visuals but about the feel. It could be truly listening to a beautiful piece of music, something moving and being fully present. You could even read a poem or a book that is particularly special in the use of words (try to avoid staring at your phone as you do).
I read something once, I cant fully remember where, that said, often in times of great suffering, when hope was lost it was moments of beauty that kept humans going. A rainbow after a flood, a sunrise after a night of sorrow, even one tree seen from a prison window can give you hope again.
This is not entertainment this is sustainment.
If your life feels so caught in the mundane, or a little weighed down, it is time to put yourself in the path of great beauty. I believe beauty holds the energy of the spirit world merged with the physical in its most natural essence. All things are creations from spirit but some represent the fullness of love, joy and wholeness and others might hold the experience of perceived separation from spirit in its frequency. When we experience beauty we are in union with our soul’s own truth. We are reflected there. In a way we remember who we really are and we are sustained.
In beauty,
Avery